Tuesday, August 24, 2010

incredible

story time. so, first important information to have: the roads in virginia are not lit like they are in other parts of the country. when you are driving through your neighborhood, around town or on the freeway the only light is from your headlights. why virginia thinks this is a good idea i will never know. i've always thought it was terrible because it means you can't go running at night... because we also don't have sidewalks here.

anyway, this evening i was driving down 288, which is a highway with two lanes going each direction. i see a disabled vehicle pulled off to the right with it's hazards on, and as i am in the lane closest to them i decide it would be a good idea to move over to the left lane. i check my mirror and see that another car is coming up pretty fast in that lane and decided not to move. then i got the impression that no, i really needed to change lanes and that person could slow down (i was going the speed limit after all).

just as i am changing lanes and passing the disabled car what should come into the view from my headlights? a person standing in the center of the lane i was just in. a moment goes like this: lane change, person, i'm gone. had to all occur in under 2 seconds. if i hadn't changed lanes i would have hit that person going 65 miles an hour because i didn't see them until i was right on them. i can't even imagine what that would have been like. i can't imagine the amount of awful terrible things that would be happening right now if i hadn't listened and changed lanes. and i can't imagine what the person could have been doing standing on the highway. how self involved, selfish and stupid can that person be? whatever was lost on the freeway was not worth risking their life and the lives of the other people on the highway. i understand that we all make mistakes, but standing on the freeway in the dark is a pretty stupid mistake.

at any rate what i wanted to say was that i am grateful for a Heavenly Father who prevented a tragedy this evening. i am grateful to have the Spirit as a companion. i am grateful that i listened.

Thursday, August 19, 2010

back in the swing

i've started running again. and by running i mean mostly walking. taking a couple months off was a bad idea. at any rate i've done at least 2 miles each day for the last 3 days. in a couple weeks i want to head to the downtown trail for the 6 miler. hopefully it will stop raining for a few days so it's not all muddy but i'm antsy to get back on that trail. i love it so much. it's just the most beautiful run and it totally makes it worth it.

i've developed a phantom of the opera obsession lately. i've watched the movie twice this week. ha. the music is addictive!

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Sunday, August 15, 2010

cheeses love you

it was so incredibly humid today. it was so humid that my brain said to me 'this is what it feels like to be a fish.' and i believe my brain. the good news is that 1. i didn't bother flat ironing my hair day and 2. some day virginia will return to a normal level of humidity.

i have finally moved back to the house in glen allen. and i have unpacked all my belongings and made my room into a some what orderly place. i didn't think this day would ever arrive... but jessica manhandled me in the parking lot today and some how that convinced me to move home. it's good though b/c em gets back from australia next weekend and we're starting up our gym routine again. i'm super excited about that. so that's the real reason i moved home.

today in sunday school we were talking about being so happy about something that you shouted for joy. and i said i can't remember a time that i've ever been that excited about something. and then at the end of church kimy said to me 'do you want grilled cheese sandwiches for dinner?' and i said 'YESSSSSS!!!! YES I DOOOOOOOO!' and then i realized i just shouted for joy about grilled cheese sandwiches. and i was sorry that i wasted my first shouting for joy on toasted bread and melted cheese.

and then we ate the grilled cheese and i realized it wasn't a waste at all.

Saturday, August 14, 2010

costa rica


so my friend katie is in costa rica with the family she nannys for. i was like hey katie what time is it in costa rica? and she said 9:30 and i was like 'what? it's 11:30 here.' turns out... costa rica... not in the caribbean. dumb. so i was like hey i'm going to check out this costa rica place so i googled a map. here is what i learned:

1. costa rica = NOT an island
2. costa rica = part of central america
3. costa rica has a city name ciudad. ciudad is spanish for city. it's like if we named a city "city". dear costa rica,
try harder.
thanks,
the world
4. costa rica has a city named golfito. this is where mini golf comes from. or at least that's what i'm telling myself.

the rivers just a river

first, i would like to state that i don't much care for the music in les mis. i've been listening to the broadway station on pandora and inevitably when i hate a song it's les mis. there, i said it.

i've had a very interesting week. and by interesting, i actually mean other words like exhausting, emotionally draining, overwhelming, stressful, sad and a bit of random adventure. work has been exasperating lately. everything seems to be getting on my nerves lately. friday i was at my wit's end. first thing in the morning i had to record all the phone greetings in the store. when we had to do this about a year ago i was able to get someone else to do it but this time there was no getting out of it. the phone recording gives me a lot of stress b/c of my tightly held belief that i have a lisp. additionally, i'm from california and i don't talk the same as the people here. so that kind of had me raw for the rest of the day. then i was working with two people that had just pushed me to the edge of what i was able to deal with.

the first lady was just mostly full of the oddest requests and questions. not to mention she was planning this huge party the day before it was to happen. why? why would you do that? if you want to do that at your house, fine... but not some where else. the questions were mostly things like 'if i order the fruit platter can you cut everything into balls?' and 'why don't you serve deviled eggs?' the second person has been a thorn for a while. he called about a month ago saying that he called me *last august* while i was on vacation and left a message and wanted to know why i didn't call him back. anyway he had an event last year and he had an event this last week and has one coming up in a few weeks. he called to change the upcoming event's date. i called back and spoke to his wife. the conversation went like this:
me: i got the message, we can do that, no problem, blah blah blah.
her: ok, i just have one question.
me: ok...
her: the room seemed smaller this time, did you move the wall?
me: uhhh, no.
her: well, i'm pretty sure the room is a couple feet smaller.
me: no, no it's not. i have to go now. because i'm going to kill myself.

i'm pretty sure i got off the phone and called her an idiot. with some added expletives. i don't know how often restaurants go around moving the walls a couple feet, but i'm guessing it's not that often. i'm just not sure how much longer i can handle this job without hurting someone. ugh.

monday i was out to dinner and our waiter was a guy who used to be waiter at my work. and was constantly trying to get me to go out with him. so dinner was *fun*. i feel like this entire week was filled with people trying to get me to do things i don't want to do. like i was constantly being guilted into doing things i didn't want to do. not like hey do these drugs or help me rob this liquor store... more like hey go to such and such place with me ::guiltguiltguilt:: last night i said to my self 'self, no more are you allowed to make choices based on guilt.' but of course that won't work b/c the only person who can't guilt trip me into doing something is me. i just feel like too often i let other people control what goes on in my life by being passive.

the other day i made the trek up to maryland to go to the temple and it was once again closed due to a power outage. it's the oddest thing. and it just compounded the feeling that nothing works out like i expect it to lately. it's not like things are going terrible or something like that... it's just that nothing works out the way i think it will... more so than i'm used to.

i wish there weren't always so many secrets. i wish people were more open and just said what they were thinking with less fear of what would happen. i wish i could just cry and not feel like an idiot.

i got a letter from kevin this week. he's doing well at the mtc. he's learning a lot and is excited to get to thailand.

i miss him. a lot.

i feel like something is coming. i just hope i see it when it comes. i'm afraid my eyes will still be closed.

update: i do like a couple songs from les mis. on my own and i dreamed a dream. but that's it.

Saturday, August 7, 2010


ok, so first, yes, i'm wearing my glasses again. i'm getting old and my eyes need help. moving on...

amber has been telling me to go to the georgetown cupcake place for months. so i have finally decided to be a good sister and go eat some cupcakes and report back on flavors. anyway we waited in line for like half an hour. they were good cupcakes and much better than any cupcake i've experienced in the state of virginia. though i have to admit... vanilla in santa monica is still my favorite. cupcakes are probably a little better and there's no wait and they make the mini cupakes so you can try more flavors. that brings me joy.

it was a really fun day in maryland. it still is confusing to my californian brain that i can drive 2 hours and be in a totally new state. i'm amazed every time it happens. i was told today if i continued another hour or so i could probably get all the way to pennsylvania. CRAZY.

i love trips up to maryland b/c you get to spend a lot of time in the car chatting. that's usually the best part of any trip up there. it's always bonding time. we had a lot of fun girl time today... talking about everything and anything. overall, excellent way to spend a saturday.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

random thoughts

i think our memories are a rolodex that are filed under senses. for example i can smell something and instantly in my brain i think of the train at knott's berry farm. or i hear 'soak up the sun' by sheryl crow and i can taste rootbeer in my mouth.

along the same lines i feel like my brain is very easily programmed into automatic responses. i only have to see something done once or twice before it becomes an automatic response. for example, whenever that song 'billionaire' would come on kevin would always say i hate this song and change the station. now, whenever i hear that song starting i think 'i hate this song' and change the station. i've never even heard the song, so i don't know that i hate... it's just the automatic response i have programmed in my brain. or at work there's this one song that when it comes on i can't stop myself from asking caitlin 'do you know what movie this is in?' because she asked me that the first time it came on. i don't do it because i want to but because i have to. maybe it's a form of turrets.

i feel like these associations are stronger when there is some sort of emotion tied to it.

i also feel like some times we remember things like a polaroid, a snap shot of a moment. you'll be sitting there thinking about whatever and then suddenly this picture from the past, a 20 second time capsule will pop into your mind out of no where. and that usually leads to a chain reaction of picture after picture of memory moments flashing through the mind. i like when that happens. it happened to me this evening. it wasn't particularly good memories, but not bad either. just little pieces of my life. and i say i remember, i remember.

lately i feel like a sponge that is completely filled with water and if you barely touch it water falls out. yes, that's indeed what i feel like. every last piece of me is at maximum capacity.

i generally don't like people when i meet them. i'm really trying to work on that. i was thinking about it this evening and of all the people i know in va there are probably 2 people who i liked when i met them. and 1 of those people isn't even my friend. it's not that she was my friend and now she isn't, we just have never become friends. so she's kind of a waste. i don't remember always being this way.

i'm reading the hitchhikers guide to the galaxy. i actually have the ultimate hitchhikers guide to the galaxy which contains 5 novels in the series. if i can get through this series i will be half way through my 10 books by the end of the year goal. here's to hoping it works out. setting a goal for a certain number of books has taken the wind out of my reading sails. i probably read about 20 books last year but i haven't been able to finish a single book this year. i've started many but have not finished one.

i really want to play laser tag.

Monday, August 2, 2010

warning

"exposure to the son may prevent burning"

there's a church that drive by on my way to work from kimy's house that has a billboard that says that. it makes me chuckle every time i see it.

anyway, things are going better these days. yay. i even got to buy my i made 1 day without crying necklace. what a champ!

this past saturday i babysat quentin. he's a very tiny child. so that's fun. i had him laying on my arm and i was flying him around the room. he's very tiny so it's easy to do. and then i can say things like 'stick your arms out!' and he actually does it. it was cracking me up. we also watched a youtube video of the tiki room about 10 times. pretty sure i have the routine memorized. the best thing though was that quentin can sing the tiki chant exactly right. crazy kid.

so today at work my boss said something sassy to me and before i could think i shouted out 'i'm not breathing again until he says sorry!' and then dramatically started holding my breath. luckily he said sorry almost instantly. but gee whiz, sometimes i'm even surprised by the things that come out of my mouth. i don't know what i would have done if he hadn't said sorry. probably would have just passed out.

speaking of work, this past friday i went to this open house at a college that is opening in our shopping center and they gave me a compass. i found out that when i'm at my desk i'm facing exactly south. i spent the next few hours trying to imagine i could see all the way to florida. and once i got frustrated with my imagination i put up this:

and now i can see to florida!