adventures never cease

things have been especially adventureful lately. and i must tell you... i am EXHAUSTED.

first i would like to discuss my first attempt at bread making. luckily i roped several other people into helping with my new little bakery. some photos!

stephanie, issac and kevin joined me for dinner and then the bread baking to end all bread baking. we had a lot of fun kneading and rising and chopping and throwing bowls of dough around. and then we enjoyed eating yummy paska bread. a special thanks to natasha for providing the recipe here. the best part though was spending time with these lovely people. there's something to be said for baking bread and then breaking bread. at any rate i had a great time learning some new cooking skills and playing in the kitchen.

friday night em and i decided to go for a little run. i got a book that has easy runs around richmond so we decided to try a new one out. the run was supposed to be just under 2 miles. if you don't get lost. which of course we did. we some how wound up on the wrong the trail and wound up running about 7 miles. if it wasn't for the fact that the trail was actually a lot of fun i probably would have wanted to die. but luckily it was a lot of fun and we've decided to do it again tomorrow. except this time i'm more prepared. i've purchased one of those backpacks that you can drink out of and i'll be bringing a cell phone with me. yes, last time we set off without any water or a cell phone. definitely won't be doing that again.

saturday em and i went to dc. we went to a lovely street market. we had crepes and we got some yummy hummus and salsa. i got a new cool necklace. a small piece of art for my bedroom. and a new purse made of alpaca! i love the purse the most. it's adorable. eventually i'll post a picture of it i'm sure. after the market we went to the national mall and played croquet in front of the capital. then bryce met us and we sat on a bench talking. then we went to a talent show where we met some guys from the naval academy. mostly em met them while i stood there gawking. after that we went to karaoke where we mostly sat in the kitchen talking to bryce. he is an interesting man.

monday night i had my pottery class. i was able to make three cylinders and not put my finger through them! i set them out to dry and next week i will add handles. YAY ugly mugs! i'm pretty excited to finish up some mugs so that i can ship them across the country to my adoring fans. i really want to make a colander. this is the one item i would like for myself. a nice blue colander. funny story about my pottery teacher: she smells *exactly* like ms. kolb my high school drama teacher... so, like an old cup of coffee. she seems like she's an interesting person. she wears a big belt buckle with a penguin on it. her nose is pierced. she has messy hair with random bobbie pins in it but it looks totally awesome. she talks about some guy who won't be her friend any more b/c she won't date him. i think she is the physical manifestation of my inner artist.

my boss is on a 'you have to play nascar with me' kick. i hate playing nascar b/c i'm not any good at it and i really hate to lose. no one likes to lose. just like no one likes to wait in lines and no one is perfect. anyway, he is always saying i owe him a game of nascar and i really don't know how much longer he thinks he can use that as a reason. especially if he is unwilling to play guitar hero with me.

in other work news, i have a new boss now. the old corporate boss got a new job and he's gone now. anyway, we had a big fight all day today about my paycheck but in the end i won. that never happens. i was pretty excited to say the least. i was mostly upset about the fact that they weren't paying me what they were supposed to b/c it meant i wasn't going to be able to fly my sister out to va but now i can! thanks for not ruining my life, work!

last night kevin convinced me to go to institute and i'm really glad he did. we went over the book of ether in the book of mormon. there's some pretty interesting stuff in there. mostly i learned that i need to try to be more kind, more charitable, more loving. i need to be more willing to help others learn and grow. one more step on the be less selfish ladder. after institute and some shopping we came back to my house and had the most random dinner. we had chips and dip, deviled eggs, pizza and truffles. it was the best dinner ever and i'm pretty sure that food had a party in my tummy. kevin made the deviled eggs and they were excellent. good job being awesome kevin!

prom is forever: part 2

at the request of laurel i will now write more about proms.

the prom i was invited to today was imaginary. no actual prom. no fancy dress. no limo with a bubble bath in it. no moms taking pictures. just goofy coworkers who like to pretend we get to go to prom. jon found that prom guide in the office and decided it would be good to ask me to go with him even though we are waaay too old to go. though, i have to admit i now greatly desire to force him to get all dressed up and go to dinner with me.

anywho, this now brings us to the real stories of prom.

TRUE LIFE: PROM

when i was a senior in high school i made a goal to attend every school dance that year with a date. i am pleased as punch to report that i did accomplish that goal. i had many fun dance experiences... like when we went to winter formal dressed as disney princesses, sadie hawkins after my performance of sunshine boys, lots of dancing and fancy dresses with ties. high school was a different time when you could get away with a lot of crazy fashion choices (i wore a lot of plaid skirts with fishnets for no reason). but i digress, this is about prom. oh the randomness that was senior prom. so for pre-prom dinner i decided it would be a good idea to go to the hop, a 50s diner where the waitresses all wear roller skates. it was pretty funny showing up there in our fancy dresses (i was always up for a good time) and i think every single one of us ordered a monte cristo. for those of you who don't know, a monte cristo is a sandwich that is deep fried, dusted with powdered sugar and then dipped in jelly. to say the least this is a heavy entree (in fact one time i made monte cristos at home and my friend still insists that i tried to kill her with a heart attack). anyway we get to prom via mini van (thanks carol and aaron for driving us!) and we begin dancing the night away at the disney hotel.

so we're dancing, we're dancing and suddenly my date is gone. for hours. we start to wonder if maybe he slipped out the window of the bathroom or was abducted by aliens or something. anyway, it gets to be the last few songs of the evening and he finally reappears and we're all dancing again and suddenly he runs over to a table and grabs a random cup and i'm thinking wow he must be REALLY thirsty if he's going to drink out of some random person's cup... but instead of taking a sip he proceeds to vomit into the cup. YES VOMIT. turns out the monte cristos + dancing = disappearing and vomiting.

we quickly wrap up the dancing portion of the evening and get back in the mini van and head home. at this point the details are a little foggy but we some how wind up at lauren's dad's house... lauren, laurel, me and my date... the puker. all other dates at this point had been dropped off at home, except the dude who has been vomiting all evening. we decide to watch pear harbor (hey, what every happened to josh hotty mc hartnett?) and of course we all fall asleep (have you ever tried to watch a movie with me? i alllllways fall asleep). anyway i wake up and it's about 2 am and i realize my date is missing. he's sick, it's 2 am and he's gone. i quickly wake the other ladies and say 'hey have you seen my date?' we immediately begin doing the only logical thing... we start checking under the beds for him. after about half an hour of searching every possible hiding spot in the house we decide we should probably call his house to let them know we had lost him. luckily for us he answered the phone. once we all fell asleep he decided it was probably best to walk the couple miles home instead of saying 'hey fools, wake up and take me home!' oh high school. if the prom pictures weren't up in the club house i'd post some. maybe eventually i'll get them down. the formal picture though totally looks like a wedding photo b/c my dress was white and he was wearing a tux. it's also awesome b/c i'm a good 3 inches or so taller than him. yay prom.

a few years later little dan was getting ready to attend his senior prom. we were discussing the details and i wanted to make it clear to dan how important prom was b/c years from now he was going to want to have material for a blog post and i bust out with the priceless gem (that we still use all the time): PROM IS FOREVER. i just meant to say, hey this is the only prom you'll ever get so make it count. but instead a creepy hallmark card saying popped out. prom is forever. truer words have never been spoken. over time the saying has involved to a two parter: prom is forever; weddings are for eternity.

prom is forever

i walked into work today and this is what my desk looked like. i was so confused and was like 'hey who put junk all over my desk?!' it's kind of hard to tell from this picture what is junk and what is the normal stuff on my desk... anyway there were a few papers taped to places, stryrofoam plate, folded napkins, flowers in a cup and a variety of other things. after a few minutes of me yelling 'what the crap happened to my desk?!' ann said don't you see what it is? there's a note and a dinner...

100 grand for dinner? don't mind if i do!

and i got asked to the prom! so exciting! i found out that my secret admirer is jon and i said yes. so now i have to go find a dress.

workin' it

yesterday we had our first all store meeting. all store is the annual staff appreciation event at d&b. here is a picture of the richmond management team. on the left with the yellow lei is scott (he joined the team about 2 months ago... he had previously worked at the store in arundel and is our senior manager), next to him in the blue shirt is james our general manager (before rva he worked in the atlanta stores... but he has worked in other stores up and down the east coast). in front of me is carolyn (she is currently the bar manager and came from a store in new york). with the orange lei is angelia our amusements manager (she came from a store in texas and has worked for d&b for over 20 years). on the far right with the glasses and hat is jon. jon started with d&b almost 2 years ago at the tempe location (my last store). he started there as a captain (a front door guy) and was promoted to a manager over the summer. he is also the person who got me started watching hockey... and he does his best to keep me sane. i adore this guy! in the middle is me... special events wonder girl. this year marks 5 years of doing the d&b thang. richmond is my 4th store... irvine, ca, san diego, ca, tempe, az and now richmond, va.

i would like to note that our heights are not right in this picture. i'm not sure what happened but you would never be able to tell our relative heights from this picture. mostly i'm not 6 inches taller than ang, or a foot taller than carolyn. and james is not taller than me. i'm not sure why the picture turned out like that. oh well!


this is ann. she shares an office with me. i spend more time with this good woman than anyone else i know. 8 hours a day she is locked in a room with me without so much as a window to look out. our one consolation is that sometimes we get to pose next to blow up palm trees.

anyway, i couldn't ask for a better person to share an office with and if she ever leaves i'm going to be very, very sad. also, she knows waaaay too much about my personal life... so if she leaves i will probably have to kill her to avoid running the risk of her telling all my secrets to the world. jokes! anyway, i just think of the world of ann. i'm pretty lucky to have such an amazing office buddy. plus she listens to all my stories... and i can really talk once i get started. if you ever want any info on me, ann is definitely the person to go to.

happy birthday baby!

today marks 1 year since we opened the store here in richmond. i decided to put up birthday decor and have a little party in the office. it made things seem exciting. whenever anyone asked whose birthday it was i would yell YOURS!

it's funny to think about all the things that have happened this year. so much, so much.

but right now no time for discussing that. it's time for tap, tap, tapioca.

books is good

we weren't a sports family when i was growing up. i think i went to my first baseball game when i was like 18 or 19 years old. this is all funny to me since now i have a deep love for many sports. i have loved baseball since i was about 18. i like to watch it on tv and i looooove to go to games. nothing beats the 7th inning stretch and a hot dog. i also have a love for the roller derby. for a few years now it has been a goal to join a derby team but that hasn't worked out yet. eventually. eventually.

this past year i have attended my first football, basketball and hockey games. for football we went to a university of richmond game, which was awesome... until it started pouring rain. like bucket fulls. it was just an absurd amount of water and wind and sadness. that's the awesomeness that is richmond weather. one moment it will be sunny and happy out and the next you will be soaking wet.

basketball... i some how managed to go from never having seen a basketball game to seeing 4 games in less than a month. this was all college basketball and i hope to some day go to a professional game. still on the list i suppose. what i like about basketball is it's a lot easier to follow than football is. football i'm always like what in the world is going on? why did they stop? football is easier to watch on tv because they put those lines on the grass with the computer. they don't do that in real life.

hockey... now that was interesting. i first started watching hockey about a year ago with a work buddy at buffalo wild wings. first i would like to say that i haaaaaaate buffalo wild wings. it's loud. it smells like cigarettes. the menu is confusing. i have a terrible time with eating wings in public. the whole thing is just a lot of pressure to perform well. at any rate i enjoy hockey b/c of the violence. i don't like sports where violence is the point (like boxing or ufc fighting), i like it when violence is a bonus (like hockey and roller derby). i mostly enjoy what i refer to as "aggressive hugging." but the besty best part is when they throw off the gloves. that's how you know they mean business. i wish that in every day life we all wore big over sized gloves so that we can throw them down when we were really serious about something. it would be a great visual to let people know they should probably either back off or get ready to do this thing.

this year i also completed my first 10k which has sent me on a crazy running obsession. i'm getting ready for a 5k mud run in may and a marine corp mud run in august. i'm currently toying with the idea of training for a marathon in november but i haven't committed myself to it yet (i just need one or two more runners to tell me i can do it and then i will be convinced).

yesterday kevin and i went to the french food festival at the little sisters of the poor convent. i had the best bacon quiche i've ever had in my entire life. it was better than any quiche i've ever experienced. it was creamy and divine. i also got this dark chocolate fudge dessert that i didn't really enjoy. i'm not a big fan of dark chocolates. it was creamy enough though that we were able to spread it on a baguette and feel fancy. kevin got some french fries that we ate with mayo... he insists they tasted like europe and i agreed because i have no idea what europe taste like but it was fun to say it.

after we left the festival we were driving home and we saw that statue that always makes me shout WHAT IS THAT? and kevin, because he is a genius, turned around and we pulled over to look at it. turns out it is a ridiculously large police officer and a little girl who is normal size and a weird little dog. the officer's name is friendly. officer friendly. some day i want to go back and take some pictures b/c the whole thing was confusing. i liked the police officer though b/c you can stand under his arm and it looks like he's giving you a hug. i like when statues hug me.

come listen to a story

so my mom recently posted a lot of old photos on facebook. which is AWESOME. first i would like to share this photo b/c it's really... uhmm... well...

it grabs your attention?

just for clarity's sake, that's brittany, my little sister, in the pink. amber has the minnie ears on. and that's me sportin' the sun dress and what looks like white tube socks.

now here's one that i think shows our personalities well:

i've always been a little goofy i suppose. i really enjoy that dress i'm wearing though and i really wish i had one just like it now. for reals, i would wear that to work. and church. and on dates. because if i wore that dress to work and church i would have lots and lots of dates. guaranteed. i would rock that with some serious heels. and conservative earrings. i'm just saying.

my hat fetish is nothing new. proof:

i really didn't think that was me when i first saw the photo. but now that i look at it i see there is one big eye and one little one... so yeah totally me. ::hahaha:: i guess i was born that way. and here i thought that was from a stroke or something.

it was actually when i was looking at that picture when i was struck by the thought of how odd it is that i'm the same exact person now as i was when the photo was taken. yes, i have more hair, i'm taller and i drive a car now but those are the same eyes looking out. the same two hands. the same smile. the same brain firing. the same shoulders and knees. the same exact little me, wearing over sized accessories. isn't that amazing? my brain has stored a lot of data since then... experiences mostly. a few math equations. a couple of good one liners. some cheesy jokes. a salsa dancing routine or two. an assortment of ideas, judgements, opinions on things that come and go. but essentially i'm that same girl.

doesn't the idea of that just break your heart in a wonderful way?

and one last photo because i want to tell a story about what i'm wearing in it:

so i'm wearing this pajama dress that i looooved. the front had a design of a bear baking blueberry muffins. the great thing about these pajamas was that they came with a matching tiny pajama dress for a doll to wear. which is fine and dandy until you realize you're 4 and you can't remember which is for your doll and which one is for you, so you just put one on and you're TRAPPED. that is the worst feeling in the entire world and even when i think about it now i get a tightness in my chest and i feel all kinds of anxiety. i don't remember how i eventually freed myself from the doll pajamas. maybe i blacked out.

when i was a child i used to get pink eye all the time. i hate pink eye. it's a terrible thing to have happen to you. it's horrifying to wake up and not be able to open your eyes. ughhh. i don't even want to think about it. anyway, i haaaated having the drops put in my eyes because you know what? those suckers sting and you don't understand that as a child. all you know is that you are miserable and sick and your eyes hurts and maybe you can't even open them anymore and what does your mom want to do? she wants you to hold your eyes open while she pours burning liquid into them. uhmm, no thanks. i remember the last time i put up a fight over the eye drops. my mom's room was at one end of the hallway and at the other end of the hallway were the two kids' rooms. so i'm in my mom's room getting the drops in... as soon as i can squirm free i run down the hallway screaming with my eyes closed because they BURN and promptly run full speed into the wall between to the rooms. head meets door jam, elaina meets falling over backwards. never again did i put up a fight with the eye drops. learned my lesson about running with my eyes closed too.

speaking of things you decide when you're 4, that's exactly the age i was when i decided to never eat mashed potatoes again... and i never have. i used to LOVE mashed potatoes. one time for dinner we had roast and vegetables and mashed potatoes for dinner. long story short that night i got sick and spent a lot of time vomiting up that dinner. but that's not when the decision came about. no. the next morning i go to the fridge where i see a tupperware bowl of all the dinner leftovers mixed together which in 4-year-old-elaina-mind looks *exactly* like my vomit and i start the whole puking business up again. no one wants to look in the fridge and see a bowl of their vomit! at any rate never again was i able to look at mashed potatoes and not think, oh look vomit. and so here i am... TWENTY TWO YEARS later... and still i'm like uhh no thanks mashed potatoes, what did you mash them with? your esophagus?!

so here is something funny about the life of elaina currently: people keep asking me if i'm part of the tea party movement. like random people at work and people who don't know me at all. i don't know why. it's not like i run around talking about politics. pssh, i'm not at a point where i can run and talk about it anything at the same time. i have no idea why people think i'm part of the tea party. i really haven't done any research into what the tea party is about. maybe i should... maybe the tea party believes that everyone should be named elaina and be awesome to each other. maybe they hold the same ideals as the wyld stallions... at least the being awesome to each other part... and being from san dimas. because then i would be perfect for the tea party. also, someone called me alex p keaton the other day. and then asked if i keep a picture of richard nixon in my bedroom. to which i replied no, it's reagan.

one last thought: for many years i've had this theory that elaina isn't a proper noun but actually an adjective. you know because people will say things like 'oh you know she's just, very elaina.' and when i was born my parents were like 'oh she's... elaina.' and that's what i think about that.

this moment

i've been thinking. about something.

too often i think we fall into the trap of thinking we're alone in our struggles. that something is ours and that no one else could possibly understand how it feels.

and then there are moments of clarity. when we realize that other people feel the same way. hurt. misunderstood. alone. sad. weak. afraid. disheartened.

today i am extremely thankful for the time i spent in arizona. for the people i met. for the experiences i had. for the way i have grown and stretched and overcome.

this photo is from mark mabry's reflections of Christ. the exhibit of these photos began at the mesa, arizona temple's visitor's center. i was fortunate enough to be able to see the exhibit while i was in arizona.

the photo makes me cry whenever i see it. i know that exact feeling. i wish i could have that every moment. every, every moment.

creepin' me out

so it turns out this richmond.com newpaperette just follows me around and put stories about my life on the front page. so this month's article is about all the races you can sign up for in richmond... some of which i've already signed up for. we'll probably reenact this picture too.

anywho, i've had a nasty cold since sunday morning and haven't gotten to run at all this week. and that's super sad for me. and then the newspaper showed up to encourage me to keep on keepin' on. thanks crazy newspaper. we have another month or so until it's the mud run. i'm pretty excited.

the wheel throwing class last night went really well. we worked on balancing the clay which i'm now pretty good at. in fact last night i dreamed about it which pretty much means i'm an expert. my muscles have memorized what to do to the point that i can do it in my sleep. i really can't wait until i can make something that i can keep. by week three we're going to be making mugs. so we'll have a lot of janky looking mugs at our house... and that's what people will be getting as gifts for the next few months. the wheel throwing really is an awesome hobby. i'm glad i'm finally taking the class after all these months. such a good stress relief. it eases my brain.

i didn't go to work today because of the sickness. i've spent the last day on the couch half asleep half watching movies. i watched 27 dresses and he's just not that into you which put me in a pretty foul mood. some times i love those movies and they make me happy and some times i hate those movies and they make me want to set things on fire. today they made me feel all wallowy and down. i'm sure the fact that i'm sicky and generally acting like a baby didn't help that mood either. and the fact that i haven't ran since saturday morning just makes it all worse. i'm tired of feeling sick and mopey. boo colds.

tomorrow i'm going to attempt to get back into my regular routine of exercise. i've still got the chest congestion so hopefully i can do it.

where my ears at?

auntie yaya.
cici.

being awesome is genetic.

noodle soup

i'm all hopped up on cold meds so this should be interesting. i had my first pottery wheel class tonight. despite the fact that i couldn't breathe i still got a lot out of the class. the teacher even told me that i was doing a really great job. imagine how great it will be when i can make pottery and breathe at the same time.

that is all.

ps why is 27 dresses depressing some days and not others?

for the record

i wanted to record this momentous occasion:

today i ran from my house to connecticut without stopping. if you have been to my neighborhood you know that's not actually that impressive but it's the furthest i've ever gone! yay for improvement.

and then my pace seriously tapered off as i began dry heaving on the side of the road.

i feel oddly accomplished. pretty sure it was the dry heaving.

at any rate, when i got home i checked the clock and i had only been out for 25 minutes. which means i did a 12/13 minute mile. which, once again, isn't impressive but it's faster than the 15 minute mile i've been running. i will for sure be able to do a 10 minute mile by march!

this morning was extra exercise-y. i went to the gym for an hour, came home and did my ab video and then ran two miles. some day soon i will be the buffness. hopefully by august. my plan for tonight is to run the two miles as soon as i get home from work and then it's settlers of catan night! i have an awesome life.

she doesn't own a dress, her hair is always a mess

so i hastily committed myself to doing the marine corps run amuck in august. i thought 'if i don't sign up for this right this second i will never sign up for it... DO IT.' and then i did. and now i have 5 months to build up my upper body strength. because the word on the street is you need a lot of that for this race. GAH! i feel like a fool but now i just have to train for it. or die. those or the options. pull it together and train for it or die. i'd prefer not to die at this point in the game. (if i do die, however, please remember i want only the good die young played at my funeral... preferably sung by a gospel choir if that's not too difficult.)

i told a friend about this early today (before i realized i had lost my mind) and she responded with something along the lines of WHAT IN THE WORLD? and i said, 'well what's the worst that could happen? the worst is my heart could explode. that's the absolute worst thing that could happen!' which didn't help at all to prove to her that this decision was a good one.

i'm excited but i have a looooot of work to do.

ps diane: please don't give me any more ideas. ever. or at least preface all ideas with 'think about this for 5 minutes before you do something.'

yesterday i submitted an application to volunteer at a local homeless shelter that will be reopening in june. they're looking for a few people to start doing work sooner than that... i think working on administrative stuff. i hope they need me. i really want to be doing something some where. i want to give back. i might keep looking for places i can work in case this doesn't pan out.

anywho, on the application it asked for hobbies (why do they always ask that?!) and i wrote "reading, art, running." it made me laugh when i looked at it. i thought about adding tap dancing but decided against it.

eventually i want to learn to play an instrument. suggestions, friends?

i'm going to try to find a place to go salsa dancing a couple times a month. the cuban motion really helps with core strength. i'd like to build that back up. plus salsa dancing is tons of fun and i love the music. i'm also looking for salsa dancing friends, if anyone is interested.

so tonight i was driving home and i grabbed a random cd and it was the mix i made for my 22nd birthday. i must say, the cd is AMAZING. i spent the evening singing at the top of my lungs and car dancing. i loooove to car dance and i don't care one bit who sees me. there's just something magical about singing along at the top of your lungs to miss independent with the bass turned all the way up while pumping the fist.

one time dan and i were on the freeway listening to kelly clarkson singing along as loud as we possibly could when the sun started to blind me and i screamed and almost killed us. dan thought i was just really into the song. but no, i was being blinded by the light. those were the days. i miss my donut friend. there is a possibility that he may come out to visit for memorial day and i am besides myself excited. PLEASE COME VISIT. please, please, please. i miss my bff.

things and stuff. stuff and things.

i have several extremely important stories to tell. i am beyond exhausted at the moment so i'm asking everyone to just bare with me if this is even more stream-of-consciousness-y than normal. also, these stories are only extremely important because i'm exhausted. it's like a terrible cycle of things i can't even think to describe. right-o, you've been warned.

story 1: why exactly is elaina so tired at the moment seeing as how it's barely 9 PM? i'll tell you what bud, don't get sassy with me. i was at the gym at 5:30 AM, worked out for an hour, came home and ran 2 miles with amber, went to work all day, met kimy for dinner, met em and went to the canal and ran over 3 miles and now i am home. some day soon i'm going to be buff and you're going to be too scared to ask questions like that. in all reality i plan on achieving my goal of running the monument 10k next march in an hour and nothing is going to stop me. i'm getting there one mile at a time... one exhausting, my legs are killing and i want to die mile at a time.

story 2: i had this craaaazy dream last night. the weird thing is i wasn't even in the dream. in my brain i'm just watching a movie. it's not like i see me watching a movie or i know that i'm watching a movie... it's just like a movie is playing in my brain. and that movie is adaptation starring my one true love nic cage. ::loves:: except my dream version of adaptation has zombies in it. and the entire time i keep thinking 'wow how could i have forgotten about the zombies?! i totally don't remember this part!' when i woke up it made me laugh b/c in dream world it makes more sense to think 'i don't remember these zombies being here' than to think 'there aren't zombies in this movie!' and that is why i love dream world. anything can happen. including running a 10k in an hour.

story 3: TIM PETERSON i blame you for story 3. i just want to throw it out to the universe that i need someone to blame and that person is tim freakin' peterson. you see last night at dinner tim and i were discussing my gyming (that's a new word i just invented! wow!) because that seems to be all i talk about these days and we were talking about how i use the weight machine and he says 'do you grunt while lifting weights?' and then i was totally offended b/c excuse me, i am a lady i would never grunt. my actually response was 'no. while i work out a make sounds like a disney princess ::insert angelic 'oh my's and 'ahhhing's and princess hands::' it was actually quite hilarious in person. in doesn't have the same impact when typed out. anywho, i just want to state that TIM PETERSON is the one who threw the whole grunting while working out thing into the universe, so he is 100% responsible for what happened at the gym this morning.

so em and i are walking up to the gym and we hear this loud grunt / yell from inside. we stop, look at each other and continue on. we get inside to find a cross between gi joe and the harlem globe trotters working out. so he's on the treadmill, running the fastest i have ever seen a person run. his legs weren't like real legs. they were like the blurry circles that the roadrunner gets when he's running away from wile e coyote. why you would ever run like that if you weren't being chased is beyond me. in my head when i think back i could almost swear he was flailing his arms as he ran but that doesn't seem totally possible. it just really seemed like he was running out of control and i expected him to be thrown into the wall at any moment. and all the while he is random yelling out these grunts. it was very distracting and, uhhmm, alarming, to say the least.

so he finishes up the running and moves to the weights. where he proceeds to back flip through the equipment. i'm not totally sure how to describe what he was doing except that he seemed to be doing crunches while balanced on his shoulder blades and he did hand stands while doing push ups. all of which wouldn't have been quite so awkward if we weren't in a 15'x15' room. i mean, we're at the gym in her apartment complex not some big place where we can hide in a corner from this man. after a few rounds of the shoulder blade, hand stand, black flips (during which, i swear his feet never touched the ground) he grabbed his shirt and left. the worst part of the entire experience was actually not the startling yell/grunts, but the fact that after he left everything in the entire room was covered in sweat. i did my best not to start dry heaving.

i'm going to pray tonight that he isn't there tomorrow. thanks a lot tim peterson.

4. i heard that newish michael buble song this morning on my way to work and i about died b/c i love it so much. enjoy the video friends!

happy easter

today i am thankful for my best friend! wish i was there!

"You can pretend to be serious; you can't pretend to be witty."

so we're watching sherlock holmes and jessica turns to me and this is what happens:

jessica: ronny told me that if you light a dorito on fire it burns blue... it's either the nacho cheesier ones or the cool ranch ones. he couldn't remember which ones.
me: lets do it.

so i only had nacho cheesier so we decided to light one of those on fire. i stand over the sink with the dorito while jessica lights it on fire. we quickly discover that it is just burning regular and it was probably the cool ranch that does cool stuff (we should have guessed from the name) and so i poured some water on the plate that was sitting in the sink and dropped the chip on it... which immediately sent a fire ball up into the air burning my arm hair off by my wrist.

there must have been oil or something on the plate that burned off when i dropped the flaming chip. that sure was exciting. this was our reaction:

me: i just got my hand caught on fire by a flaming dorito. we really need to start dating so that this isn't what we're doing on saturday nights!
jessica: elaina... i haven't told you because i thought it went without saying...but i don't date girls
me: ::hahaha:: no. if we dated each other we would still be sitting here watching a movie and lighting doritos on fire. we definitely need other people. people who will say "don't light that tortilla chip on fire!"

what an exciting evening. speaking of exciting things we had a pancake breakfast this morning.

fun things happened like:


jim ate butter. friends, i wish that was a joke but it isn't. the man ate butter. from the stick. he picked up the stick and took a bite. a bite of butter. and then i started dry heaving.

joseph walked into our glass door. joseph is one of the smartest people i know. he's probably the smartest guy i know. and so at first i thought he was joking and then i realized he wasn't. and then i laughed. a lot. because i am mean. sorry joseph. i hope your face feels better now!

jim made me a pancake shaped like a shoe. because he is totally into stuff like that. he loves shoes and purses and braiding hair and cooking breakfast. jim is pretty awesome if you ask me.

the men cooked for us. that never happens at our house. i documented the momentous occasion.

so tonight i was thinking about my opinion on panhandlers. i was mostly thinking about it because i think it's not the same as most people's. so now i will share it with you. so, i believe that if you see a person who is homeless and they have some sort of sign asking for help or they ask you for help and if you have money to spare on you then it is your responsibility as a decent person to give it to them.

i know a lot of people say well, they're probably just lying but to me it's not about that. so often people don't ask for help when they really need it and so when i see someone standing there with an actual sign saying i need help, it's only right to do what i can. and if the person is lying that makes them a bad person and not me. they will be accountable for being a liar and a thief. if they're not lying i will be accountable for not using the gifts that have been given to me to help those less fortunate.

i think this thought process applies to other kinds of relationships in our lives. too often we assume the worst of people or do only what we see as being beneficial for another person.

my last blog thought: i'm weird. ::hahaha:: so my roommate amber has this cat who is afraid of the world and just likes to hide around. anyway tonight she decided she loves me and just wanted to sit on my bed next to me. she was like 'hey elaina, lets be friends always. i like you for no real reason other than the fact that you smell good and there is carpet on the floor in here.' i feel like this is my life these days. i also feel like people see me as being a walking television show. i'm not. this probably seems random and doesn't make a lot of sense but it makes sense to me. if you'd like further clarification please contact management. she'd be happy to explain.