they called me eddie

so i'm eating left over lasagna and puddin' cups for dinner. that makes me feel like a dude. i don't know why. is that how men eat? pudding and microwaved lasagna from tuesday? i think that's what it must be like.


this was the world's longest week where nothing worked out like i wanted it to. stupid universe. so tonight i was supposed to go see hamlet but we thought it was going to rain so we didn't go. i wanted to cry and it put me in a nasty mood. i can't help that i am ridiculously obsessed with shakespeare. it's just one of those things. shakespeare, disney movies and a new guy every two weeks. and then it didn't even rain during the time of the show. LAME.


i have this goal to learn something new every day. mostly i want to learn how to tie a tie. but i haven't learned that yet. so far i have learned that some bridge some where is the most photographed in the united states but i didn't believe it. and i learned to make lasagna. and uhm i don't think i learned anything else. oh wait! today katie told me that there is a plant called a plantain and it's not the quasi banana. i didn't believe that either until she sent me a link where i saw the broad leaf plantain. and then i stopped thinking she was a liar. i also learned who glenn beck is. so that's two things for today!


oh! i almost saw a man almost drive through a panera. that would be a way cooler story if i had seen him almost drive though the panera. or if i almost saw him drive through a panera. but instead i almost saw him almost drive through the panera.


the corporate big bosses came this last week. i didn't do anything ridiculous while they were around. i acted pretty normal. the regional over new stores told me that he thinks i'm doing more sales than tulsa b/c my office is bigger. i think steam came out my ears a little bit. but i didn't even do an eyebrow flick that i am aware of.


last week i was up in maryland walking alone in the woods and i met a family of deer. there were 5 of them. and one started to follow me. i was really afraid it was going to attack me and kick me in the face until i died. i'm REALLY afraid of that happening. jon told me that if you see a deer in the road and you know you can't stop then you should hit the deer going as fast as you can. that way you hit the deer like a ball on a tee. otherwise the deer will land on the hood of your car and will kick through your windshield and kick you until you die. this is why i am scared of everything.


i'm also EXTREMELY afraid of thunderstorms. last week my power went out and i didn't know what to do. and tonight i was driving home and a crazy storm started. it was raining so much i couldn't even see out the windshield. and i had to roll my windows up. i love driving with the windows down here. except when it makes me drown. and then a storm warning came on the radio and it says "SEEK SHELTER AND STAY AWAY FROM WINDOWS." i don't know why anyone thinks that helps. that is just scary! plus it sounds like a robot. and i'm like hey can't they get someone who doesn't sound like a robot? maybe a nice soothing mom voice saying 'now would be a good time to go home and drink hot chocolate.' anyway, there are windows every where in a car! i managed to white knuckle it the entire way home... like full lean forwards, shoulders at ears, death grip on the steering wheel, holding my breath style. the good news? i didn't die!


i painted some tights up for this alice in wonderland party i'm going to next week.

i hand painted those while i was wearing them. i'm really impressed with how they turned out. when i'm all dressed up i'll take pictures of the entire outfit. so watch out for that!

today i really needed my back popped. the top part of my spine was killing me. anyway a man picked me up in the kitchen and popped it. AWKWARD. at first i was like this is a great idea until he started to do it and then i realized it was the worst idea in the world... especially in front of all the employees in the middle of the kitchen. it mostly involved him grabbing me around the rib cage area and making the top part of my spine arch. which 1. totally pops your back and 2. is a great show for all the kitchen workers. so, you know, two birds. ::sigh:: i was mostly shocked at the fact that he without out any real warning picked me up off the ground. i'm now very paranoid that at any moment a person could walk up behind me and pick me up off my feet. i would never see that coming.